After Zach was diagnosed with CHD, I struggled with many questions. The one that plagued me the most was,
If God doesn't make mistakes, then how do you explain heart defects (or any other birth defects, for that matter)?
First, let me set the record straight. As any parent of a child with special needs will tell you, there is a whole continuum of emotions that you go through, particularly in the beginning. You experience everything from anger with God to denial to fear to complete trust in The Creator. Since God created me and my emotions, I don't think any of those feelings are wrong unless I allow them to turn me away from God indefinitely. God will use even negative emotions to draw me to Him, BUT I have to make the choice to move toward Him and not away from Him.
So, as Bill and I sat in the waiting room during Zach's first surgery, the BT Shunt, I opened my Bible and began reading. I was crying out to God to please save the life of our baby through the skilled hands of the surgeon, anesthesiologis, and nurses. I was questioning why God allowed this to happen to our little boy. I was needing confirmation of what I knew in my head to be true --- God does not make mistakes.
At the time, my mind just couldn't produce any addresses to scriptures that would settle my head and heart on this matter. Now, as I sit at my computer, I can use Bible Gateway to do a keyword search to find any number of verses about God's perfection, such as:
Deuteronomy 32:4
The Rock—His work is perfect;
all His ways are entirely just.
A faithful God, without prejudice,
He is righteous and true."
Psalm 18:30
As for God, his way is perfect;
the word of the LORD is flawless.
He is a shield for all who take refuge in him.
Matthew 5:48
Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.
Romans 12:2
Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.
God is perfect. His will is perfect. His creation is perfect.
A defect is a mishap, a flaw, a mistake. Not perfect.
In the midst of all the turmoil going on in my grieving heart as I sat in that waiting room, as helpless as my baby laying on that cold operating table, God gave me this scripture:
1 Corinthians 12: 14-20
Now the body is not made up of one part but of many. If the foot should say, "Because I am not a hand, I do not belong to the body," it would not for that reason cease to be part of the body. And if the ear should say, "Because I am not an eye, I do not belong to the body," it would not for that reason cease to be part of the body. If the whole body were an eye, where would the sense of hearing be? If the whole body were an ear, where would the sense of smell be? But in fact God has arranged the parts in the body, every one of them, just as he wanted them to be. If they were all one part, where would the body be? As it is, there are many parts, but one body.
Now, I know that Paul is talking about spiritual gifts here and how everyone has an important role, no matter what they were gifted to do. Maybe I am interpreting this scripture out of context, which can be a dangerous thing to do. Nonetheless, I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that 1 Corinthians 12: 14-20 gave me a measure of peace that morning so long ago. God didn't make a mistake. God created Zach and his special heart just as He wanted them to be. Perfect.
